I havent blogged in awhile so this one might become rather lengthy... For a couple of months now i havent felt like myself.. There has been a couple things happen to me that i am not able to talk about and i cope by just trying to shut everything out and not talk about it and just move on.. But this time it was different.. I started being someone im not.. I started treating others badly and talking bad about others behind there backs.. Because of these problems that i refused to take care of.. That's not me at all.. I have made so many friends, but seem to have lost the majority of them.. Not sure if it was all my fault but im sure most of it was... Im all about success and dreams.. I want everyone in this whole world to do what they have always dreamed of.. Because you dream of things you want to do because you love them and you can picture yourself being good at whatever it is.. My problem is, that I want everyone to be successfull so if i see them starting to fall i go and try to catch them and fix their problems.. This problem of mine had become huge.. I am so busy worrying about others that i have let myself completely fall.. And it is kinda hard to get back up.. Im not sure anyone understands but i dont expect them too... There is a song that i dearly love and i was listening to it and the chrous really hit me,"Tonight I've fallen and i cant get up, i need those loving arms to come and pick me up." That is exactly what i needed help from those loving hands from the man up above.. I have been Praying and reading, and reading and praying and asking for help, so that i can understand why I am having these problems, and i finally got the answer i needed....
This last weekend our wonderful beloved Prophet came to dedicate the beautiful Gila Valley Temple.. We went to the cultural Celebration that my little brothers were in and President Monson was there.. My mom and I got seats on the grass.. I kept texting Morgan and Joey to trade me spots cuz they could see the dances better, but all of the sudden President Monson pulled up in his golf cart and was only a row in front of me.. He looked me right in the eye and smiled.. others got the better deal and got to shake his hand and actually talk to him.. But as he smiled that simple smile.. my heart sank and the water works happened instantly.. It was such an awesome experience..
After last night i have thought about all my problems and talked to my mom who stayed with me for the weekend.. I came to the conclusion that if I try to be happy and think that im happy.. I will become happy and all i need is that simple smile.. What i have been missing these past couple of months is that simple smile that left my face and is now back in place.. Everyone has there little problems and some have big ones and some have bigger ones.. but we should never give up just hold on and keep going.. i heard this quote in one of my english classes, "When things go wrong as they sometimes will,When the road you're trudging seems all up hill, When the funds are low and the debts are high And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit, Rest if you must, but don't you quit. Life is queer with its twists and turns, As every one of us sometimes learns, And many a failure turns about When he might have won had he stuck it out; Don't give up though the pace seems slow--You may succeed with another blow, Success is failure turned inside out--The silver tint of the clouds of doubt, And you never can tell how close you are, It may be near when it seems so far; So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--It's when things seem worst that you must not quit."
I have found my problem and my solution.. I know im not perfect and everyone has there ups and downs, but it was hard for me this time because it was a different problem then i have ever had.. I let myself down and others around me to... I formed into something i wasnt and became unhappy.. That isnt how i was raised or the way i was taught.. I was taught that if i had a problem to take care of it instantly and not to let it eat at me till it got bigger to where it ate me.. I forgot what i was taught for a short few months, all i needed was a little smile to remind me and pull me through.. I know that the only thing that has gotten me through all of this was my wonderful mom and have the gospel in my life.. I cant even imagine how i would of known what to do if I wouldnt of been there when the Prophet was and to feel the spirit that i did.. I am so thankful for the gospel in my life and my family...Without either of them.. I believe i wouldnt be here today.. They have helped me tremendously in so many ways.. and i know that they are both there to pick me up when i fall...
This last weekend our wonderful beloved Prophet came to dedicate the beautiful Gila Valley Temple.. We went to the cultural Celebration that my little brothers were in and President Monson was there.. My mom and I got seats on the grass.. I kept texting Morgan and Joey to trade me spots cuz they could see the dances better, but all of the sudden President Monson pulled up in his golf cart and was only a row in front of me.. He looked me right in the eye and smiled.. others got the better deal and got to shake his hand and actually talk to him.. But as he smiled that simple smile.. my heart sank and the water works happened instantly.. It was such an awesome experience..
After last night i have thought about all my problems and talked to my mom who stayed with me for the weekend.. I came to the conclusion that if I try to be happy and think that im happy.. I will become happy and all i need is that simple smile.. What i have been missing these past couple of months is that simple smile that left my face and is now back in place.. Everyone has there little problems and some have big ones and some have bigger ones.. but we should never give up just hold on and keep going.. i heard this quote in one of my english classes, "When things go wrong as they sometimes will,When the road you're trudging seems all up hill, When the funds are low and the debts are high And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit, Rest if you must, but don't you quit. Life is queer with its twists and turns, As every one of us sometimes learns, And many a failure turns about When he might have won had he stuck it out; Don't give up though the pace seems slow--You may succeed with another blow, Success is failure turned inside out--The silver tint of the clouds of doubt, And you never can tell how close you are, It may be near when it seems so far; So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--It's when things seem worst that you must not quit."
I have found my problem and my solution.. I know im not perfect and everyone has there ups and downs, but it was hard for me this time because it was a different problem then i have ever had.. I let myself down and others around me to... I formed into something i wasnt and became unhappy.. That isnt how i was raised or the way i was taught.. I was taught that if i had a problem to take care of it instantly and not to let it eat at me till it got bigger to where it ate me.. I forgot what i was taught for a short few months, all i needed was a little smile to remind me and pull me through.. I know that the only thing that has gotten me through all of this was my wonderful mom and have the gospel in my life.. I cant even imagine how i would of known what to do if I wouldnt of been there when the Prophet was and to feel the spirit that i did.. I am so thankful for the gospel in my life and my family...Without either of them.. I believe i wouldnt be here today.. They have helped me tremendously in so many ways.. and i know that they are both there to pick me up when i fall...
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